This morning, I had a session with my client Rob, who has been having a hard time with the scale. Rob has been weighing himself every day (which we recommend most of our clients do). One day this week, his weigh-in was much higher than he expected, which made him feel demoralized. He got off track, and it took about three days for him to get back on track. Rob said that now that he’s back on track, he can see how irrational it was for him to be off track for several days. In the moment, he felt powerless to stop it.
I discussed with Rob that what happened made total sense. He got on the scale, saw a higher number, and it immediately triggered a sense of helplessness and hopelessness. And because he felt helpless and hopeless, of course he got off track. I told him that my goal for next time would be for him to regain access sooner and continue whittling away at the amount of time he gets off track. I asked Rob, “Now that you’re past it, back on track, and the scale is once again trending down, what do you want to remember next time the scale goes up? Because it will go up again! It’s part of the process.”
Rob and I made the following Response Cards:
The scale going up is part of the process. Nothing bad or wrong is happening. Keep doing what I’m doing, and the scale will go down again.
Just because the scale is up, doesn’t mean it will stay up. I’m not helpless, and this situation is not hopeless. The last time the scale went up, I was off track for three days. Once I got back on track, I was so glad I did. The scale going up didn’t matter in the long run because it went down again. Don’t get off track this time. Prove to yourself that you can overcome the discouragement, stay on track, and the number will be down again in no time.
Rob and I also discussed that part of the reason he felt so discouraged by the number on the scale going up was because he was relying on the scale as a reward for his hard work. I reminded Rob that the scale is a very unreliable reward! Sometimes it goes up when we think it should be down, and sometimes it goes down when we’re shocked it’s not up. Even though the scale isn’t a reliable reward, his sense of control when he’s on track is a reliable reward. His not feeling overly stuffed after meals and feeling good about the choices he’s making is very reliable.
Rob made one last Response Card:
I can’t rely on the scale to be a reward for my hard work because it’s unreliable. That’s just the way it is. But what I can rely on is how great it feels to be in control. How great it feels to leave a meal not feeling sick and stuffed. How great it feels to go to bed at night knowing I made good choices. Those things are reliable.