Friday Weekend Warm-up: If you get off track at any point this weekend, IMMEDIATELY RECOVER! You’ll be so proud of your ability to get back on track, instead of mad at yourself for slipping up.
In session this week, my client Lisa told me she was struggling in the evenings. While she found it fairly easy to stick to her plan of healthy meals and snacks during the day, in the late evening (usually around 9pm) she was going into the kitchen and eating treats, telling herself, “It doesn’t matter.”
The first thing I asked Lisa was, “What’s in your kitchen? Do you have a lot of treats in the house right now?” Lisa said that she did. She had a lot of leftover holiday desserts, plus she loads up on groceries (including junk food) when she grocery shops, since she now goes less than usual. I told Lisa that having a house full of a variety of desserts would be hard for anyone, no matter how long they’ve been working on these things. The greater variety of treats there are, the more it tricks people into thinking they should eat.
Lisa said, “That’s true. When I think about having the ginger snaps I have planned, that doesn’t sound as appealing as all that other stuff.” I responded, “Exactly! But if ginger snaps were the only dessert you had in the house, chances are they would sound more appealing. You would eat them and feel satisfied.”
Another reason having so many treats in the house was sabotaging Lisa was because whether or not she was fully aware of it, she was probably actively resisting eating them all day. The more times in a day she tells herself, “No, you can’t have that,” the more decision fatigue starts to set in, in addition to real fatigue in the evening! Saying “yes” starts to feel more reasonable.
I told Lisa, “It’s not as if your body tells you, ‘You said no ten times, so the eleventh time you can say yes and I won’t process the calories.’ Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. Saying ‘no’ ten times doesn’t necessarily mean it’s okay to say ‘yes’ the eleventh time, especially if it’s not on your plan.”
Lisa and I discussed her thought, “It doesn’t matter.” I said to her, “Actually, I’m wondering if it’s just the opposite. I’m wondering if those late night decisions actually matter the most because by giving in in the evening and taking in too many calories, it’s stopping you from being able to lose weight. So, it does matter; it matters the most.” Lisa and I discussed that by staying on track all day but giving in late in the evening, it’s like she’s run 24 miles of a 26.2 marathon. It’s still a huge achievement, but she won’t get the finisher’s medal without the last 2.2 miles.
Lisa and I made some Response Cards for her to read in the evening, and we agreed on a three-part plan: First, she’ll get rid of most the treats in her house. Second, she’ll make a strong plan for what she’ll eat in the evening, and third, she’ll read Response Cards to remind herself exactly why it does matter.
Thursday Think Tip: Are you reading your Advantages List and Response Cards? If you’ve let those things drop off, restart today. They’re critical tools for motivation and will help you remember why all this effort is worth it.
Tuesday Reality Check: It’s important to remember that you need to make eating decisions based on what works for you, not what everyone around you is doing. Remind yourself that what everyone around you is eating is irrelevant, and that if you eat extra, you’ll gain weight, regardless of whether others are overeating, too.
Monday Motivation: Make a commitment this week to focus on the things you’re doing well, NOT the mistakes you may make. Doing so will help you feel better and more motivated daily, which will make it easier to keep moving forward. If you’ve never been someone who can focus on the positives, make 2021 the year that you start. We could all use more positivity in our lives!
Friday Weekend Warm-up: It’s much easier to stay in control when you maintain some type of eating schedule, even during the weekend, so that you don’t wind up just grazing all day. This weekend, don’t let unstructured time become unstructured eating.
Thursday Think Tip: Did you get off track with things like drinking water, meditation, or meal planning during the busy holiday season? If so, TODAY IS THE DAY to restart!
Wednesday Sabotage: I’m just not an exerciser.
Response: Just because I haven’t been able to institute a consistent exercise routine in the past, doesn’t mean this can’t be the time I finally make it a habit. January is a great time to recommit to a REASONABLE exercise plan. I need to start somewhere – a 10-minute walk three times this week – and work up from there.
Tuesday Reality Check: We know 2020 was a weird and often hard year. We can’t know what 2021 brings because so much is out of out of our control. Instead of focusing on what you can’t control, focus on what you CAN control – your eating and your exercise. Those things will make you feel good!
Monday Motivation: If you think, “I can’t believe how much I overate this weekend,” remind yourself: “I can’t change what I ate in the past, only what I eat today and in the future. So, instead of ruminating on past mistakes, I need to focus on making today a great day!”
The Beck Diet Program was developed by Dr. Judith S. Beck with Deborah Beck Busis, LCSW.
Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy is a leading international source for training, therapy, and resources in CBT.
One Belmont Avenue, Suite 700
Bala Cynwyd, PA 19004-1610