I’m Not Losing Weight Anyway

My client, Ellie, hasn’t been consistently on track the last few weeks and is feeling frustrated that she hasn’t lost any weight in the past two months. I asked Ellie where she was struggling the most, and she said that it was usually around dessert. She would start eating dessert, and then know she should stop after finishing her planned amount but would keep going, often because she had the thought, “I’m not losing weight anyway so what does it matter?” Ellie and I discussed this thought in depth so that she would have a powerful response to it the next time it popped up.

Ellie and I looked back through her weight chart (she provides her weight once a week in session) and we saw that she actually has been losing weight – but it’s the two or three pounds that she keeps regaining. “Imagine if you hadn’t gained any weight in the past months,” I told her, “You’d be down 10 pounds.” Hearing that was sobering but helpful for Ellie. She realized that she was losing – but not in a way that was showing progress.  She made a Response Card:

Actually, I am losing weight, but I keep losing the same two pounds that I gain. Eating extra dessert DOES matter because if I do, I’ll continue to spin my wheels and not make any downward progress. As soon as I get dessert under control, I’ll get to see the scale go down, stay down, and then go down some more.

woman thinking

I then asked Ellie how she felt when she overate dessert and she responded that she felt terrible! She often got a sugar hangover and spent the rest of the evening feeling poorly. Ellie made a Response Card:

Overeating dessert DOES matter because when I do, I feel crappy. Not only does it have consequences on my weight, but it has immediate negative consequences on how I feel physically.

Ellie also told me that the more she eats sugar, the more she craves it and since she’s been eating so much of it lately, she feels like she’s at the mercy of her cravings. She told me her cravings plague her all day, which is very different from a few months ago when they were much more under control. Ellie noted that another thought she often has about overeating dessert is, “I just want the freedom of being able to eat what I want and not think about it.” I asked Ellie how free she felt when her cravings were tormenting her, and she answered, “Not free at all. There’s no peace in my head.” Ellie made the following Response Card:

I hate feeling at the mercy of my cravings. There’s a false freedom in overeating dessert because all it does is rob me of my freedom from cravings and peace in my head.

Finally, Ellie reminded me that she’s been going through a hard time in her life (her father is very sick) and it’s become more important than ever for her to take care of herself. Ellie knows that in overeating dessert, she’s making choices that aren’t good for her body, which just isn’t sitting well with her. Ellie made the following Response Card to remind herself of this important idea:

It’s so important to me to take care of myself in terms of what I eat.

I instructed Ellie to read these Response Cards three times a day, every day, for the next week. Just hearing them once in session isn’t enough; Ellie needs to be reading these messages repeatedly to help them really sink in. Doing so will give her the best chance possible at getting dessert (and her cravings) back to a manageable level.

1 reply
  1. Rose
    Rose says:

    I always receive your posts just when I need it the most. Thank you. I am re-reading Diet Trap Solution. Desserts are my downfall as well. The more sweets I eat, the more I want. I think sometimes it’s best to go cold turkey for a time, just to prove it to yourself that you can go without.


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